Benji Spam II
Hello there Soulseekers! My name is Benji Evans. I believe that I have become more and more addicted to chat as of late. I love chatting with my friends and I love trying to troll my enemies. I have adopted a Ricky persona and I have tried to become friendly with him. Ricky is the one who can protect me in chat. His chat persona is really working out for me. I have expanded upon it and I add in bigger words to make myself appear a more formidable opponent in the chat arena. I discover these words from Kurt Kren and Truancy. Another one of my hobbies is rap music. I love it. I could listen it to all the time and I love listening to it while at the gym. I wish that a white man listening to rap was more accepted but, at least on Soulseek, I can be free. Speaking of being free, it is become more difficult to cover up my mental illness. Even as I type this I am fidgeting and shaking like crazy. I need my medications but I do not want to take them. I believe that vitamins and exercise will cure me. I read that on a blog. I am not really sure what else I can offer people apart from chat. My background is quite chaotic and I moved schools a lot. I think my instability is still showing and will continue to show forever. I do hope that no one in chat will find out the truth about me. I just want to be loved by someone, be it online or in real life. I would prefer an online romance though. Online girls are more reliable. I can arrange to meet them at a certain time and we can chat for hours. Having to deal with girls in real life is far too much hassle. Online I am hidden behind a screen and they can not see my true self. I do not like people seeing me for me. I want to project the image of me that I want people to see. I am very self-conscious. Again this comes from my background of instability and chronic esteem problems.
Benji Spam
Hi there Soulseekers! My name is Benjamin Evans. I currently reside in the UK and suffer from mild mental illness which is progressing into something more chronic. I like to post fabricated text message conversations that I have with girls who only exist in my mind. I do this in chat to try and hide the fact that I am possibly homosexual. I scour the internet for pictures of girls and I post them in chat and claim that they were sent to me via cell phone. This does not happen as the only girls numbers I have in my phonebook are my mothers and my sisters. I like to write long, rambling diatribes that mean nothing at all but contain an awful lot of big words that I read in chat. I do this in the hope that I will appear to be more intelligent but, due to my own short sightedness, it just makes me look stupid and I don’t realise this. I fawn over the females in chat and act passively towards them in the hope that they will accept my facade. I enjoy pretending to go to the gym and I like letting everyone know when I am “at the gym”. If people see I am really fit then they will hopefully like me, even though I am just another lonely kid on Soulseek trying to make something of myself but trying in all the wrong places. I try to spark up romance with females on the other side of the Atlantic. This means that they are at a safe distance and I do not have to worry about physical contact with them. I have a few favorites in the Indie room right now, namely Spir and Caroline. Spir comes out on top because I always had a thing for the older woman. I believe an older woman can show me the love that my own mother never showed me and she can provide the physical intimacy that I so crave with my mother and sister.
Peaces Pnwed
[BENJI PSYCHOTIC EVANS] Hello there Soulseekers! My name is Benjamin Òpeace or piecesÓ Evans. My mental state has deteriorated over the last few days and I feel that my marathon chat sessions will come to an end once I am detained under the Mental Health Act. You may have noticed me acting a little more aggressive than normal. I am perfectly fine, I just stopped taking my medication because going to the gym and taking mega-doses of vitamins A, B, C, K will help me become mentally stable. Yesterday I logged in with the screen name [peaces out and about] to try and fool you all in to thinking I was really in the gym, exercising and chatting at the same time. Truth of the matter is that I was just Òout and aboutÓ in my kitchen rather than in my bedroom. When I post pictures of girls and claim these girls sent them to my, this is a made up fantasy. I am really lonely and girls donÕt talk to me on account of me being schizophrenic and my crumbling mental state. I get these pictures from Facebook and Photobucket and post them in chat, hoping to dupe everyone into thinking I am a real romeo. I sometimes feel that by acting this way will cover up my own feelings of inadequacy about my manliness. I also like to create fake text messages from ÒgirlsÓ and relay these in chat, hopefully to garner some attention and become known as a heartbreaker. Again these are all made up. I think the main reason for me making stuff up is because, as a child, I made up a lot of stuff and this has just continued into my adult life. As you can tell my mental state is declining and things are getting worse. I am trying to become more assertive but itÕs not working as I can only Google facts so quickly and the real intellectuals in chat are outdoing me. I like using fancy words and hyperbole and hope that it will scare people away from me and I will come across as having deep psychological insight into different matters when, in actual fact, IÕm just a young man, barely out of puberty, with a shoddy education and a low IQ.
Refreshing Chats
[Ashford & Simpson] i just need to clock in another half- hour of chat and then i'll have motivation to start my day. chat is so invigorating and refreshing
Peace or Pieces aka Benji Evans Rambling Mess From Leicester
[peace or pieces] Eliot Rodgers defines faggotry.
[peace or pieces] May all faggots of the world die.
[peace or pieces] Kill them.
[peace or pieces] You must understand.
[peace or pieces] Faggots like Elliot Rodgers would have been castrated the instance they were mentality and action were observed as 'queer'... Faggots must be killed before they are to practice out there psycho-social fantasy of grandeur.
[peace or pieces] Elliot Rodgers defines extreme faggotry.
[peace or pieces] I is.
[peace or pieces] Stop attempting to shoot what I'm critiqueing down.
[peace or pieces] Like you have ammo that is capable.
[peace or pieces] Understand.
[peace or pieces] < clear of mind.
[peace or pieces] What is your problem?
[peace or pieces] Do you not get the reason?
[peace or pieces] You need to understand.
[peace or pieces] Faggots like Elliot Rodgers must be killed as the old world natural order of things would have demanded.
[peace or pieces] Understand this is not a matter sexual preference.
[peace or pieces] Male or female.
[peace or pieces] Watch the media create a victimization of the faggot.
[peace or pieces] Watch the media deceive the masses without the right view.
[peace or pieces] Understand.
[peace or pieces] Your reaction is not viable.
[peace or pieces] It is but a reaction out of fear.
[peace or pieces] It is still fresh.
[peace or pieces] I will not be silenced.
[peace or pieces] This need to be airred.
[peace or pieces] 2014.
[peace or pieces] < adament.
[peace or pieces] < right.
[peace or pieces] < just.
[peace or pieces] It's out of anger I will critque it better, best understand that. This faggot-queer nature in men does not deserve testosterone and anyone who doesn't see this.. Really, I would liek to see them try come at an angle against what I'm saying and what I will.
[peace or pieces] This kind of people in the extreme are who want see us suffer. In a way he looked for a end. It doesn't mean he shouldn't have been dead before he carried out what he did.
[peace or pieces] He would have made in politics.
[peace or pieces] it in*
[peace or pieces] Tubby I'd expect those saggy triceps pulling those sluggish forearms around that crusty keyboard would have something better to say on the matter.
[peace or pieces] But yes I will advance this Ricks.
[peace or pieces] It's still raw.
[peace or pieces] This is fresh.
[peace or pieces] Obsession is not matter.
[peace or pieces] a*
[peace or pieces] Unlike uncreative.
[peace or pieces] That video defines faggotry.
[peace or pieces] In the old world he would have been slaughtered before he could cause such an act.
[peace or pieces] Faggot does not relate to sexual preference if so you are homophobic and can have no say in the matter. Gays are homo's.
[peace or pieces] Queer goes hand in hand.
[peace or pieces] The repetitive thought process involved.
[peace or pieces] Causes a faggot to emerge.
[peace or pieces] The extreme.
[peace or pieces] A tilt of this axis are whom 'run' the world. HOW THE FUCK DID ...man... Let these people become.
[peace or pieces] They do not deserve testosterone.
[peace or pieces] Understand.
[peace or pieces] Hi.
[peace or pieces] Are Ocelots able to be domesticated?
[peace or pieces] Nice.
[peace or pieces] It's much more deep rooted than getting the p.
[peace or pieces] Needs airring out the system.
[peace or pieces] And the system... .
[peace or pieces] And the system.
[peace or pieces] IS RUN By THE SAME.
[peace or pieces] Faggotry.
[peace or pieces] You are trolling with no crativity again.
[peace or pieces] I don't like to see this from you.
[peace or pieces] I expect better sonnyjim.
[peace or pieces] I'm talking about faggots. So for eg. the Iceman Killer was not a faggot but he did what he will. He had it all. Maybe he killed some faggots in his time.
[peace or pieces] Kuklinski.
[peace or pieces] Shaka examplifies the mentality daily.
[peace or pieces] Rogan also.
[peace or pieces] Many people here do.
[peace or pieces] I didn't say extemely.
[peace or pieces] extremely*
[peace or pieces] You've agreed on the subject 6 months ago Rick.
[peace or pieces] You are only against the sentiment as to push my point.
[peace or pieces] I appreciate it.
[peace or pieces] Because faggot.
[peace or pieces] Nice pic.
Errr Pancake
[Pancake Repairman] imagine the man whose only means of social acknowledgement is spamming gibberish in a chatroom
[Pancake Repairman] then imagine the man bold enough to suicide and how much envy the former man must have for this latter man
More Stuggy
[18:06][stugrennacs] plus because Dad knows that army blokes take the mick out of Dad mothers day card Dad makes sure the kissing part of thecard with the ''love you lots and lots mummy'' writing is face down so the army blokes dont see it
[18:09][stugrennacs] i think Dad will be etter off if he just got card which is a bit more angry without the kissing bits like just ''have a good day from your son''
[16:36][stugrennacs] i want to document Dad salking bits on here when i freindly with other people
[16:37][stugrennacs] he goes cold shoulder with the chatting when i speak to other men dosent he
[16:40][stugrennacs] you can tell its salking with him with his blog and putting the lols down for me and then when i move onto other men with the freindlyness with the chatting hes off the stool and that with that lot
[16:42][stugrennacs] there were 2 bits of salking from him last wek that you could feel through the screen with his atmosphere in indie
16:44][stugrennacs] and i knew it was because of my freindlyness with the other people that he went right off the whole lot with his moods and that
[16:44][stugrennacs] did you get it when he was here peace
[16:44][stugrennacs] with the salking and that
[16:51][stugrennacs] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNnQTaX4iLw <------------ heres nice song for the feel good factor, just forget Dad sulking bits
[16:59][stugrennacs] im going to come on in here tommorrow when he gets back from belfast boots shop store after his work and not say anything and see if his sulking bits comes back again, cheers
[17:03][stugrennacs] thats why he goes off early on thurs for boots chemist working job in the belfast
[17:03][stugrennacs] i bet theres sulking to the staff as well in boots
In response to me saying "stugrennacs, what's going on"
[17:06][stugrennacs] no its ok peachpit but see if you can see his sulking when hes on next and that, thanks a lot
[stugrennacs] here you are put that on the box with the cloth for cleaning
[stugrennacs] kurt is very wasted talent but then actually if you think about it most really clever blokes are in the board room conference with the big business so give kurt a good bit of freindlyness because its most unusual for him to shun the rest of the vclever people and stay here with us, thanks a lot kurt
[stugrennacs] anyway lets post this war film and new toy soldiers i got my neighbours 17 year old daughter for her birthday
[stugrennacs] kurt at this very moment i`m describing the world encyclapedia fourth edition to colony of dung beetles
[stugrennacs] i spose its a bit like when your in british pub and that in a way, when you speaking to billy for quite a bit and then billlys turns around really quickly and speaksto someone else like'' oyyah your wife let you out tonight for the drinking then charlie'' and you dont hear from billy again as he moved onto the rest of the crowd to get in with them as well for the freindlyness
[stugrennacs] its strange isnt it because when you leave the british pub there all outside in the sun loking at you as you leave and you think youll never get to know that lot because there all in little gatherings of family unit at each beer garden/carpark table speaking about me leaving and then there washing machine and i thought after you can lok at me leaving british pub but i dont want to get to know you all as, well i just dont
[stugrennacs] this bit just came into my head so you might as well hear it, wel not hear but ill write this bit down as well---------------> if i am millionaire overnight with lottery ill get eiderdown made with £50 notes on the spare bedroom and if aunty and uncle come over for the celebrations and want early morning paper with stuggy toast and that and need 50 pee for the paper and hhavent got any spare change i can just say heres a pair of scissors just cut the £50 poun d off the bed for the paper,
[stugrennacs] [sent while offline][th3thund3r] Banned??!? WTF? <------------ [19:49][stugrennacs] you betcha
[20:53][stugrennacs] you wernt sharing with the greed and blokes who share having to wait 3 weeks before your downloads in america finished, hope this helps
[20:54][stugrennacs] im in indie room if you want to speak to me, cheers
[21:25][stugrennacs] im not in indie now because of that lot, thanks
[21:35][stugrennacs] i went back in for a bit more of the indie, cheers mate
[21:35][stugrennacs] no actually im not in there now come to think about it
[21:39][th3thund3r] I'm sharing 35k+ songs and I'm in the Uk...
[21:40][stugrennacs] ok lets have another lok for you r popmusic with it
[21:41][th3thund3r] ...what?
[21:43][stugrennacs] due know what im putting you off the whole lot with it
[21:44][th3thund3r] I have no idea what you're talking about???????????????????
[19:52][stugrennacs] 00:51] amorc I am SO stoned <--------- leave saudi then,you get stoned there for being stoned
[19:52][stugrennacs] 00:51] amorc I am SO stoned <--------- leave saudi then,you get stoned there for being stoned
[20:23][stugrennacs] peace you have to accept were 8 hours behind these men , you deffo should realise theres talking from every corner of the planet going on, were notgoing to heareverything being said in the world
[20:26][stugrennacs] im staying here alll night justto see how long you stay here for, im not saying anotherword though tonight, your stupid staying up this late, its stupid
[20:26][peace or pieces] Whatever stug
[20:27][stugrennacs] well thats fine, i dont need to stay herenow
[04:28][stugrennacs] anyway been here all night in the departure loungue so lets get going for the african safari, see you all in 3 weeks, thanks a lot
[stugrennacs] but then if a man is going to jump off the building or fall of work ladder it could be good cushion to cushion the fall if 10 ladys with foam umbrellas are waiting at british bus stop
[stugrennacs] what annys me sometime is with some people with the fame, oooo lok i spoke to stuggy and he responded
[stugrennacs] bit stupid with some people letting it go to their head with my teachings and that, oooo stuggy spoke to me as well
[stugrennacs] ray used to be problem eater and mumsy had to coax him to eat the choo train and nows its hitlers dippy egg soldiers brrrmm burummm
[stugrennacs] im eating lions bar and when you lok at the bite marks, the wafer bit loks like lions mane with the fur bit, i bet a lion would like this bar
[stugrennacs] very nice bar
[stugrennacs] what makes dogs go bananas in the home mostly is when they allow the little doggys to lick the husbands facewhen there asleep which makes the dog go nuts because they can smell the beefburgers and hot dogs on the husbands lips
[stugrennacs] i love when chat speak comes to sudden stop like broken print press with the newspapers and everybody stops to read rest of stuggy story before carrying on chatting
[stugrennacs] oh thats right Dad you off and join risk in not going to british disco
[stugrennacs] you go off as well without not saying a word
[stugrennacs] i know those 2 have got real probs with the living in the indie for the top dog at the top of the tree with the seagulls trying to be masters of their art when its just a load of trashy art paintings i wouldnt even give 2 penneths worth in british musuem /old people collecting money on the door because thats ray and dad doing the same collecting job when soulseek goes off the air
[stugrennacs] anyway let them get on with it with the sulking when im not saying hello enought o them and diong lols for their confidence bits
[stugrennacs] cool story bro
[18:09][stugrennacs] i think Dad will be etter off if he just got card which is a bit more angry without the kissing bits like just ''have a good day from your son''
[16:36][stugrennacs] i want to document Dad salking bits on here when i freindly with other people
[16:37][stugrennacs] he goes cold shoulder with the chatting when i speak to other men dosent he
[16:40][stugrennacs] you can tell its salking with him with his blog and putting the lols down for me and then when i move onto other men with the freindlyness with the chatting hes off the stool and that with that lot
[16:42][stugrennacs] there were 2 bits of salking from him last wek that you could feel through the screen with his atmosphere in indie
16:44][stugrennacs] and i knew it was because of my freindlyness with the other people that he went right off the whole lot with his moods and that
[16:44][stugrennacs] did you get it when he was here peace
[16:44][stugrennacs] with the salking and that
[16:51][stugrennacs] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNnQTaX4iLw <------------ heres nice song for the feel good factor, just forget Dad sulking bits
[16:59][stugrennacs] im going to come on in here tommorrow when he gets back from belfast boots shop store after his work and not say anything and see if his sulking bits comes back again, cheers
[17:03][stugrennacs] thats why he goes off early on thurs for boots chemist working job in the belfast
[17:03][stugrennacs] i bet theres sulking to the staff as well in boots
In response to me saying "stugrennacs, what's going on"
[17:06][stugrennacs] no its ok peachpit but see if you can see his sulking when hes on next and that, thanks a lot
[stugrennacs] here you are put that on the box with the cloth for cleaning
[stugrennacs] kurt is very wasted talent but then actually if you think about it most really clever blokes are in the board room conference with the big business so give kurt a good bit of freindlyness because its most unusual for him to shun the rest of the vclever people and stay here with us, thanks a lot kurt
[stugrennacs] anyway lets post this war film and new toy soldiers i got my neighbours 17 year old daughter for her birthday
[stugrennacs] kurt at this very moment i`m describing the world encyclapedia fourth edition to colony of dung beetles
[stugrennacs] i spose its a bit like when your in british pub and that in a way, when you speaking to billy for quite a bit and then billlys turns around really quickly and speaksto someone else like'' oyyah your wife let you out tonight for the drinking then charlie'' and you dont hear from billy again as he moved onto the rest of the crowd to get in with them as well for the freindlyness
[stugrennacs] its strange isnt it because when you leave the british pub there all outside in the sun loking at you as you leave and you think youll never get to know that lot because there all in little gatherings of family unit at each beer garden/carpark table speaking about me leaving and then there washing machine and i thought after you can lok at me leaving british pub but i dont want to get to know you all as, well i just dont
[stugrennacs] this bit just came into my head so you might as well hear it, wel not hear but ill write this bit down as well---------------> if i am millionaire overnight with lottery ill get eiderdown made with £50 notes on the spare bedroom and if aunty and uncle come over for the celebrations and want early morning paper with stuggy toast and that and need 50 pee for the paper and hhavent got any spare change i can just say heres a pair of scissors just cut the £50 poun d off the bed for the paper,
[stugrennacs] [sent while offline][th3thund3r] Banned??!? WTF? <------------ [19:49][stugrennacs] you betcha
[20:53][stugrennacs] you wernt sharing with the greed and blokes who share having to wait 3 weeks before your downloads in america finished, hope this helps
[20:54][stugrennacs] im in indie room if you want to speak to me, cheers
[21:25][stugrennacs] im not in indie now because of that lot, thanks
[21:35][stugrennacs] i went back in for a bit more of the indie, cheers mate
[21:35][stugrennacs] no actually im not in there now come to think about it
[21:39][th3thund3r] I'm sharing 35k+ songs and I'm in the Uk...
[21:40][stugrennacs] ok lets have another lok for you r popmusic with it
[21:41][th3thund3r] ...what?
[21:43][stugrennacs] due know what im putting you off the whole lot with it
[21:44][th3thund3r] I have no idea what you're talking about???????????????????
[19:52][stugrennacs] 00:51] amorc I am SO stoned <--------- leave saudi then,you get stoned there for being stoned
[19:52][stugrennacs] 00:51] amorc I am SO stoned <--------- leave saudi then,you get stoned there for being stoned
[20:23][stugrennacs] peace you have to accept were 8 hours behind these men , you deffo should realise theres talking from every corner of the planet going on, were notgoing to heareverything being said in the world
[20:26][stugrennacs] im staying here alll night justto see how long you stay here for, im not saying anotherword though tonight, your stupid staying up this late, its stupid
[20:26][peace or pieces] Whatever stug
[20:27][stugrennacs] well thats fine, i dont need to stay herenow
[04:28][stugrennacs] anyway been here all night in the departure loungue so lets get going for the african safari, see you all in 3 weeks, thanks a lot
[stugrennacs] but then if a man is going to jump off the building or fall of work ladder it could be good cushion to cushion the fall if 10 ladys with foam umbrellas are waiting at british bus stop
[stugrennacs] what annys me sometime is with some people with the fame, oooo lok i spoke to stuggy and he responded
[stugrennacs] bit stupid with some people letting it go to their head with my teachings and that, oooo stuggy spoke to me as well
[stugrennacs] ray used to be problem eater and mumsy had to coax him to eat the choo train and nows its hitlers dippy egg soldiers brrrmm burummm
[stugrennacs] im eating lions bar and when you lok at the bite marks, the wafer bit loks like lions mane with the fur bit, i bet a lion would like this bar
[stugrennacs] very nice bar
[stugrennacs] what makes dogs go bananas in the home mostly is when they allow the little doggys to lick the husbands facewhen there asleep which makes the dog go nuts because they can smell the beefburgers and hot dogs on the husbands lips
[stugrennacs] i love when chat speak comes to sudden stop like broken print press with the newspapers and everybody stops to read rest of stuggy story before carrying on chatting
[stugrennacs] oh thats right Dad you off and join risk in not going to british disco
[stugrennacs] you go off as well without not saying a word
[stugrennacs] i know those 2 have got real probs with the living in the indie for the top dog at the top of the tree with the seagulls trying to be masters of their art when its just a load of trashy art paintings i wouldnt even give 2 penneths worth in british musuem /old people collecting money on the door because thats ray and dad doing the same collecting job when soulseek goes off the air
[stugrennacs] anyway let them get on with it with the sulking when im not saying hello enought o them and diong lols for their confidence bits
[stugrennacs] cool story bro
BLISTERING WHITE LACOSTE SOX
[monkey island II] imagine gatsbys white lacoste socks in between his leather dress shoes and denims
Rick0wn3d
[ricky bieber] HI GUYS MY NAME IS RICKY. I AM FROM RUSSIA AND I AM 38 YEAR OLD. I LIVE IN USA WITH MY MOTHER BUT I LIKE TO THINK OF MYSELF AS AMERICAN, ALTHOUGH I CAN NOT VOTE. I SIT IN INDIE ROOM ALL DAY AND WHEN I SEE A TOPIC OF CONVERSATION ARISE THAT I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT, WHICH IS MOST OF THE TIME, I GOOGLE THE TOPIC TO MAKE MYSELF APPEAR KNOWLEDGABLE. I AM EXTREMELY MATERIALISTIC AND NARCISSISTIC. MY NARCISSISM STEMS FROM MY SHITTY CHILDHOOD WHEN MY FATHER WOULD BEAT ME AND MY MOTHER, WHICH WAS THE REASON FOR US LEAVING MOTHER RUSSIA. MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS WERE NEVER MET AND THE BEHAVIOR I DISPLAY ONLINE HIDES MY DEEP SHAME AND EMOTIONAL HURT IN MY CHILDHOOD, WHICH I HAVE NEVER GOTTEN OVER. I HAVE AN OBSESSIVE INTEREST IN AMERICAN CELEBRITIES AND VIDEO GAMES, EVEN AT THE AGE OF 38. ENJOYING THE LIVES OF CELEBRITIES, AND LIVING IN THE FANTASY OF VIDEO GAMES. THESE THINGS MEET ALL MY OWN UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS WHICH WILL NEVER BE MET IN MY OWN LIFE. I FEAR MY OWN FEELINGS AND DO NOT HAVE ANY CLOSE RELATIONSHIPS AND AM NOT YET MATURE ENOUGH FOR LOVE. MY SELF-ESTEEM IS FRAGILE BUT I MASK IT WITH OVERTLY MACHO BEHAVIOR AND RACISM.
Shit Th'on Bed
[(/:=)] i shit the bed last nite and rolled around it when i woke up it was all over my back